After your divorce, simply getting through your daily routine can be difficult. Your entire life has been turned upside down. With the Holidays right around the corner, this time of the year can feel insurmountable. The holidays are supposed to be a time to celebrate peace and love, but many divorced couples find it difficult to put aside their differences and compromise for a few days. The holidays can be difficult for divorced parents, but it is important to work together to get through the season in a way that is best for everyone. Your children deserve a merry Holiday Season, regardless of how their parents feel about one another.
This isn’t impossible! Here are a few tips, as told by our Covington, LA family attorneys:
#1 Planning ahead will save everyone a lot of anger and stress. Make your plans with your ex-spouse ahead of time and stick to them. Let the kids know where they will be and when so they feel in control.
#2 Be flexible. Stuff happens! If your ex is an hour late because of traffic or because the food took longer than he thought to be cooked, try to let it go. Do you want your kids to remember the Christmas their parents screamed at each other on the front lawn? We didn’t think so!
#3 This is the Holiday Season and a little extra kindness goes a long way. Keep your pain, anger, resentment, guilt, annoyance, disgust, and hurt feelings about your ex to yourself. These feelings have no part in the festivities! If they say something that would normally set you off, do everyone a favor and let it go.
#4 Don’t compete! If your ex can afford more than you, that is okay. Rather than resenting your children’s other parent, appreciate that your kids can experience and enjoy things you can’t buy them. You don’t need to overspend to keep up. Instead, make memories by doing fun things together like looking at Christman lights, baking cookies, reading a Christmas story, and singing carols.
#5 Lastly, remember that you are the adult here. Suck up your anger toward your ex and make the holidays wonderful for your kids. They deserve it! And hating their other parent so much you can’t get through Christmas only hurts them, the kids you love. Divorce is the severing of the adult relationship and should not be the termination of the parent-child relationship. If your child is not in harm’s way, the relationship needs to continue. This is the children’s right.
We hope these five tips help you get through the Holiday Season with a bit of peace. If you have any questions or problems with what’s going on in your family’s Holiday Season planning, don’t hesitate to reach out to our family lawyers. We’re here to help!